Olivia Lee, your comment was so wonderful i dont think you understand. why do i want this new boys attention? hes so nice, and cute. and i really like him. and it makes me feel good that he could like me too. i am physically attracted to him. but i think a lot of it is that im bored with my boy now. so to know i CANT have Tyler is something i like. my current boyfriend hasnt been making me feel special. i dont know....
i know you dont judge me girl. :)
i love love love that you always send me skinnies. it totally helps! :D
i'd love to talk to you about stuff. you seem so level headed. :)
i went with my painting boy (okay this is annyoing his name is Ike! its Ike!), so anyways, i went with Ike to get his tattoo done today. it took two hours and like fifteen minutes, and he was shaking so hard. cause they were practically tattooing bone hes so skinny.
it has like family meaning. so thats why it might not make sense.
cool none the less i thought.
so i didnt eat all day. then Ike came over to my dads and we had mozzarella sticks and french fries. the home made ones were like 140 calories each, and i had five. plus fries. so the sticks alone were 700. so i purged. almost all of it i think. maybe 150-200 stayed in. i couldnt get all the cheese up. ew.then later i had some chocolate frosting. so lets go... 400 for the day?
idk.
but other wise, im getting good at this not eating thing. :D
i just need to start exercising again, did i mention its been like five days?
ughh.
i dont feel huge though.
you can lose weight. but only if you do NOTHING. like if you dont eat, then you dont have to exercise. is the way i've been looking at it. lol. but if i eat, i have to exercise. and i hateeee exercising, so i just dont eat. lol.
its 11. fuck me. its late. im tired. but i dont want to sleep yet.
where did my fucking day go?
ugh.
boyfriend is coming over tomorrow. first time i've seen him in a long time.
things wont be weird cause i know i kissed Tyler. they'll be weird cause stuffs been weird.
it started with the whole, im losing interest in having sex with him. idk. its not interesting.
blah. i feel like a hoe.
tomorrow will be good. i told the kids at my lunch table since i eat such a big breakfast *lie* that i dont want to eat lunch. and that when i get home i have a big snack *lie* so i wont even be hungry for long. which means. i dont need to eat lunch anymore.
cool. cool.
love you girls.
88 followers. :)
thank you.
Uhmm, go you for barely eating! That's my plan for tomorrow. Eep, hope I can do it! Okay...if you don't watch South Park, disregard this comment. But ohmygawd please tell me that Ike is Canadian and his head is all weird!
ReplyDeleteSending you good vibes dude, you need the strength for boyfriend. Try talking to him about the bored feeling you're experiencing with sex? I know that once the sex gets boring, it doesn't feel good. and then it makes you feel awful about yourself for continuing it. I totally get the excitement about new people though. Sometimes we just need a little freaking excitement in our life, and new people are super fun! I hope you start to have some clarification abotu what you want from these boys soon...I can tell it's an important time for you. :)
Sending you soooo many skinnies that you can't even fit them in your pockets! :D Have a great day tomorrow dear, try to breathe.
P.S. you aren't a hoe.
ReplyDeleteI always had issues staying faithful to one guy. :/ Short attention span? Incapable of actual love? Perhaps a combination of both. Just think of it this way--If we were still wild animals instead of "civilized" modern humans, you would probably be the leader of your pack and have your pick of however many lads you wanted, because you're the alpha bloody female and it's your right as pack leader. :D
ReplyDeleteSo you can't really fight your natural instincts. <3 <3
That tattoo is pretty rad.
xoxo
man i know EXACTLY! i would rather fast all day than eat and have to burn it off lol!! since i'm grounded next week i can do this again :) yay for not eating!
ReplyDeletegirl, you and your boys. i'm jealous.