Tuesday Evening

lo sieto my loves. its been a while, again. i get lazy. hahha.

so i started fasting. the last time i ate was sometime sunday evening. i know its only tuesday, so not like a huge deal. but i still havent eaten. i suppose i have been "cheating" though. i had a bowl of broth yesterday and two candy canes today. other wise, im doing great. been drinking a lot of juice, and diet coke. i was 131 yesterday, and today im 129.5, so seeing some progress. i took a picture for you guys, myself really, after my shower today.

also, i have sort of a problem. i self harm, you know that, whatever. thats not the problem. i burned myself the other day... and its crazy infected. least i think so, imma show you, and im sorry that you have to see my scars and such, i just need to know what i should do. what do you think i should do? is it really infected?

im gonna start working out again. i gave up on that for a while. and i convinced my self i shouldnt feel bad about not exercising since i was maintaining 131. but my tummy is pudgy. so its time to tone it up. what should i do do you think? what are your favorite ways to tone up a tummy?

also, my birthday is on thursdayyyy. :D

paniccc! :D

meeting panic! was the best experience of my life. :D

i posted an ass load of pictures on facebook, and on my tumblr.

they were so wonderful, and nice, and handsome! :D

i geeked so hard.

i was front row dead center, on the barricade. it was awesome. could not have been closer. the first picture is of how many people were there. my ribs and sternum got bruised from being pushed so hard against the barricade.

i took an assload of videos. i uploaded them to youtube. so i'll link them here. it was great! :DD

so i've been away for a few days. im lazy. haha.

i havent eaten very well the past two days. but i havent really gained that i've noticed. i'll get back on track no worries.

well this is just a quick update, since i wanna lay down and watch spongebob. lol.

just took a shower and shaved my legs. i feel great haha.

havin' a "party" tomorrow after work. i hope tyler will come. doubt it though. regardless, i'll probably drunk text him. haha.

by the way i dunno if i have mentioned recently but theres this boy who i like. his name is Greg. and he is just the cutest thing ever. and he always smells sooo goddamn good. and he has this habit of biting his lip while hes talking to me, and it just makes me meltttt. and he has blue eyes. and a super deep voice, but in a sexy way. its fantastic. hes fantastic. one catch, he has a girl friend. and we were talking one day about how "im a home wrecker" and he told me, his exact words, "dont wreck my home" dammmnnn!! hahaha. i was like "woah dude. rejected? hahah" i was just surprised he said that, and put it that way.

thats about it i suppose. i'll up date soon again. :)

party time

thanks everyone for the wishes of fun. :)

and thanks rachael for the advice on the stye. its gone now actually. :)

and i bet you look fine swimming. haha.

so yesterday i had people over and we all got super drunk. tyler came over dude! i invited people he knew, then he texted me saying "heard youre having people over" and he cammmmee. :D

he ended up leaving with some sober people because they convinced him his bed was a better idea. gahhh. he coulda slept in my queen size bed with me. oh but this girl jessi was there with me. jessi and i were in my room with the lights off just chillin' and tyler comes in. jokes about a threesome, and me and jessi are like "dude. we'd totally have a threesome with you" and he was like "what? really?" but we didnt do that. lol. but we had a three way make out. lmao. it was fun. im not bi or lesbian or anything but jessi is cute as fuck. :)

oh then this morning i got to clean up my house. and right now i have a bag full of empty liquor bottles, and empty glass beer bottles. and i dont know what to do with them. like, i cant just recycle them. because my grandpa goes though it to make sure its all separated right or whatever. so idk what to do. it'd be easy if it were like five bottles. but its a lot. lmao.

oh and my best friend kelly told me she loves hugging me because im thin and curvy. lol.

took a picture this morning of what i look like. i feel bloated from all the alcohol though. so im not that nice looking. whateves.

though i look big, i feel like im making progress. i'll get there for sure. :)

i havent eaten anything yet today <3 hopefully today will be great.

well i have a really bad headache. so i might just try to sleep.

see yah ladies.

you are so awesome it hurts

so guyyysss. tuesday november 8th i get to see panic! at the disco for the fifth time. but this time will be different. i'll still be font row. still get there five hours early (im a little nuts), but this time i get to meet them. i have the pleasure of meeting brendon urie, spencer smith, dallon weeks, and ian crowford of panic! at the disco. :DDD i get a picture and autographsss. im so excited. so i made them all bracelets. you all know that bracelets are my thing. i have a ton, and i make a ton. so im hoping they'll wear them, if not keep them and remember me. :)

im so excited.

so today wasnt that bad. i had a browine, a muffin, and rice cripsy square at this school event. i had orange juice for breakfast, at lunch i had some chips (couldnt help it), came home had an egg a handful of chips... ummmm. i think thats it. i drank a lot of diet coke today. today wasnt anywhere near good. but not that bad.

i have a stye in my eye. i dont even know how to spell it. its a bump on the inside of my lower lid. it hurts a lot, is swollen, and i look ugly.

been swimming every morning zero hour at school for 45 minutes. its cold and sucks. but super tiring. good exercise to start my day, and it wakes me up.

guys, anyone watch dexter? cause im shitting my pants. i love it soooo muchhhh! so much. damn. im on episode three of season six, and he just dropped all his slides. i feel anxiety and ocd towards that, and it upsets me that the order is mixed up and all that. damnnn. im addicted.

well, im tired. and watching family guy. i love all my new followers on tumblr. thanks if you followed me. :)

see yah soon loves.

but wishes of course, are for children.

back again! follow me on tumblr encounterswithana.tumblr.com

halloween was fun. i forgot to tell you guys that i was a skeleton. if only i was nearly bones every day.

like it? :) it was a ton of fun.

so i ate not bad per say. but surely not like i should have. i purged though. then i showered. and i pretty much weigh before i shower always. you know, perfect opportunity, all naked and stuff. haha. but anyways im at 130.5, i think i feel like im further than i am. just think, i was 122. only like eight pounds away. holy shit! i could maybe be 122 or lower by my birthday! i have to do this ladies. my ultimate birthday present to myself would be to be 117 pounds. unrealistic i feel though. so i'll try my best. i think thats what i need. "trying my best" not worrying if i dont make exactly what i wanted, progress is progress.

ohhhh! i got a job too! my first job everrr. exciting right? its at a pizza place. haha. im a waitress. :)

and thanks for all your love and welcome on account of me being back. much love to you ladies. :)

thats it. :) think thin loves. look at some thinspo.

byeee.

didnt expect to see me, did you?

hey girls. im not sure why i stopped blogging. got real antisocial for a while. im at about 132 pounds. so not much has changed. i got to pretty much have the best night of my life with Tyler. if you guys remember who that is anyways.

i feel like i've accomplished a lot lately. though i dont know what to tell you all. im a rugby player. thats new. we one first place at our state game. it was a proud moment.

i've recently been addicted to tumblr. so i made one for my blog here. i decided after seeing all the beautiful thin women on tumblr, and all around the world really, anywhere, that im going to give an honest effort to try again.

i was taking vyvanse for a while actually. showed this kid my boobs, he gave me 10 pills. they are fucking wonderful. you dont wanna eat AT ALL. its so great. but now i cant seem to find more. this other kid wants 20 dollars for four pills. fuckkkk dude. the price of being thin. so i guess i'll try something else.

i was thinking today, i wanted to be thin by 17th birthday. i cannot believe i keep letting myself down. its crazy really. my mother lets me down. the men in my life let me down. my friends let me down. and i cannot believe that i am the worst of all. i let myself down more than anyone i suppose. its quite shameful. since i've been gone so long, i bet a lot of you arent even gonna read this. but i'd like if you did. because im going to be here, and tumblr as much as possible. tumblr probably more. though thats just me posting an ass load of pictures. haha. so follow me on tumblr. and stay tuned here. i'll try my best to not let myself, or you girls down anymore. its not fair, to anyone.

encounterswithana.tumblr.com

simple enough. go follow me. :)