i realized today that

i've been half assing my workouts. yeah. cause today i didnt, and im so sore. gr.
i havent counted my calories in forever. but i have been this and last week. and im not doing so well. on a normal day when i think im doing "good" or "alright" or "not bad", im in the thousands. thats so bad. like, everday. so yesterday was like 1,200, and today was 1,500! this is not acceptable!
im really tired today. but i have to read a few chapters of A Tale of Two Cities for english. and its the most boring book ever. i havent weighed in a few days, but on saturday i met my two pound goal. i was 126, even after the thousands a day. but i did exercise a lot. i barley exercised yesterday. i dont think i'll meet my two pound goal by this sunday. i dont feel like i've got it this week. but i do right? i can do it right?
my birthday is creeping up fast. and im afraid i wont be even close to 120. i would be so god damn happy if i got down to 123 or 124. so as long as i lose, it doesnt matter. i think this mind set of, eat around 1000 or less, and exercise. and lose two pounds a week, is working. its sort of, healthy. but im not trying to be healthy, im just too fat to eat less. idk.
i think i'll fast tomorrow. its just hard with school because EVERYDAY i dont have something to eat everyones like, "annie, wheres youre food?" i mean i guess its good that they care. but come on.
so i have a foods class at like 10am, then lunch at 12:15 but they dont know when i have foods class, so i could just not bring a lunch, or better yet, bring a lunch and give it away, saying im not hungry. haha. so if for some reason i have to eat, it'll be less than 300 calories tomorrow. i'll try my best! hah.

so i was on facebook, and this girl had this picture. and ick. just look at if for your self.


look how fat that first girl is. what the fuck? shes not more than 16 years old too. icky. then that dark blue dress in the middle, shes skinny.

wanna see a picture of me and my boy from a while ago? dont tell him! thanks. :)

this is when i shaved half my head and dyed it purple. it was so goddamn cool. now its much longer, and i dyed it back black. i love this man ladies. and i am going to marry him. he told me so. :)

okay, i'll talk to you later. :)
night.