so my birthday is December 1st. sweet sixteen. and i have a pair of jeans that i used to wear, that were like my favorite, but im too fat for them now. so my goal is to fit into them. i'd love to fit nicely. like not be sung at all. but as long as i can get my fat ass into them. that'd be cool.
so i havent eaten today. this morning i had some juice. and then just a bit ago i had a bowl of broth. so i guess, that counts as eating... sorta. but the broth was only 10 calories. and it was nice and warm. :)
i honestly havent fasted in AGES like, seriously. its been forever. so today. im not gonna eat actual food. so i guess a liquid fast. tomorrow i'd like to fast too. but i'll HAVE to eat lunch. so maybe a jar of baby food? not liquid, but not quite solid. so yeah.
i seriously like gave up for a while. like when i hadnt posted in ages, or exercised in ages. but that changes today. November 8th 2010. i will be thin. i've finally decided, its easy. just, dont eat. i deserve to be thin. right? i would be so much happier if i was thin.
so i will be thin. so that gives me, what, like 23 days? so yeah.
the other day i was 129.5, then the day after that like 128.5. so idk where i am now. i'd say 128. so, i bet i can fit in those pants at 120 pounds. do you think? i mean. they SORT OF fit now. i can put my legs in. i just cant get them all the way over my big butt. so yeah. if i lose eight pounds in 23 days. i should fit into them. will that work? is eight pounds too big of a goal? well, i need to lose at least eight by December 1st. so i guess i should make like, mini goals. so i guess i should lose like 2-3 pounds a week to meet that goal. it probably will be hard. since i've been 125-129 for months. i think i just need to try. i think i've just been maintaining. i've had the mind set "if i fuck up once today, its okay. i can eat what i want. and while im at it, i wont exercise. cause i will tomorrow, i promise" and then i dont. my mind makes excuses for what my mouth wants to eat.
gah. so i think i can do it. i just need to get motivated, and stick to it. i think i will this time. i can do it. i will be thin.
on a sort of different note, my boyfriend asked me when im going to let him see my blog. he knows i have one. but doesnt know AT ALL what i talk about here. it makes me sad. cause he thinks i'll let him. he thinks im normal, and that i just come on here to talk about normal teenage girl things. but i dont. im not here to talk about my life. im here to talk about how fat i think i am. thats so pathetic. im sorry i cant show him. he'd be disappointed in me. im sorry.
so, is broth okay? is babyfood okay?
hope so.
im gonna let my tummy rest (its full of lots of water and some broth), and then i'll go bounce around with weights. lol.
i'll see yah.
The broth and babyfood are ok. :) Also 23days to loose 8lbs. is more than enough time, I wouldnt be surprised if you lost 10lbs. Anyway I've been slacking off alot to I need to get back thanks for motivating me! :) Stay strong hun!
ReplyDeleteReading this was like reading something I'd written myself. You are feeling exactly the same as me! I know you can do it, 8 lbs is more than doable! Mine is 20 lbs by dec haha!! Stay strong and you'll do it : D I know plenty of people who drink broth on fasts and still lose Hun, but only ever heard of the baby food diet, not eating it on a fast
ReplyDeleteKeep going hun, let's get into thoses skinny pants (; xox
I think you can lose 8 lbs in 23 days no problem.
ReplyDelete16?? I totally thought you were well into your 20's the way you write! :p
Good luck getting back into those jeans! I know you can do it. ;)
xoxo
23 days for 8lbs is definitely possible. you can do it for sure. broth is excellent :) i've never tried the babyfood thing but i'm sure it'll be good!
ReplyDeletexx